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Friday 27 March 2009

Eliminate the negative

I have been accused by 'anonymous' commentator of being 'smug' and I have even made anonymous want to 'puke'. I guess when you decide to write about your life on the world wide web then you are inviting the whole wide world to write back.

So I'm not complaining, if I don't like the comments I don't have to publish them and if you don't like the blog you don't have to read it (although I know that sometimes you can feel compelled and repulsed by something).

Anyway this isn't my point. My actual point - yes for once maybe I do have one- is that I believe in the power of positive thought, I believe that thoughts have an energy and that with energy like attracts like, so I try to focus on all that is good in my life. I'm not always successful and I often over compensate but I like to be on the sunny side street.

Do you really want to hear how I'm a love f*ckwit who doesn't know when to stop loving; or that I can barely pay my mortgage; that money is so tight that I thought that maybe if I wasn't around Isobel would not have this financial worry; that I worry about managing to keep the bubble with PD intact for as long as possible as he deserves to know his little girl, they love each other so much; would you rather I wrote about how sh*t I feel that because of me they will not grow up together and that I'm struggling to balance the fact that PD and I are split up with the fact that we are a family (and we still fancy each other, maybe that's just one way); I wonder f I will ever (again, yes I had it once) find someone to love who loves me back and who wants to help me raise my daughter; will I have sex again!; I can be insecure; I feel inadequate compared to my NCT pals; do you want to know that right now I'm watching ER with a soggy (not saggy, well maybe a little) bottom because I'm using an ice pack as a cushion to reduce the pain in my back.

You see in many ways life isn't easy but I would rather wax lyrical about the great things in my life.

To be honest I know you'd rather hear the gory details, and perhaps if I could remain anonymous I might tell you. But in the meantime, this my blog and I'll point it which ever way I want.

I want a good life, so that's I try to look for in the one I've got. (I did say try)


5 comments:

Coding Mamma (Tasha) said...

As you say, tis your blog; post what you want.

I think it's great to be positive. I'm surprised at how much moaning I end up doing on my blog, especially as I am generally quite a happy, contented person. I wonder sometimes if it is pandering to what the readership will want more. Hope not.

From what I can see of you, you are a great mum and Isobel looks like she's thriving on your care. Managing to keep PD so involved is admirable, too, and I'm sure can be difficult at times.

I love seeing the photos of Isobel and reading about her milestones. If it helps you to be positive, then keep it up!

Gray Collins said...

Ignore doubters. Kick ass post Miss F.

stefanie said...

Isobel needs , wants, and loves you..dont go anywhere.

that is a beautiful picture of you both..get pd to make it big for your wall

chin up

xx love us

Carol M said...

Way to go girl! Ignore the 'anonymous' moaner! If they don't like it they don't have to read it, but clearly they have been entertained enough to keep reading!
For the rest of us, it's great to be able to keep in touch with how you're both doing, and in my view has always been quite balanced! We always know when things are not going well, 'cos you disappear for a few days!
Keep up the good work! xx

Anonymous said...

I read your blog whenever I get a chance, and every time I am inspired by what an awesome job you are doing raising beautiful little Isobel, especially while doing your best to cope with some rather difficult circumstances! Please ignore the negative comments..they are most likely come from a place of jealousy (hence the nasty...). Please keep up the most excellent work :)