Since Friday I have been having a bit of a wobble. Tears have sprung forth at an alarming rate and I have often vacillated between hiding and running away. Obviously I have done neither of these things.
I have attempted to function normally, including entertaining on Sunday lunchtime, my reapplication of mascara had dried before the guests arrived. I just knew if I cancelled I would feel worse because that would be giving in, so I propped myself up with more champagne and red wine than was probably advisable! I had a lovely time and managed not to cry until everyone had left.
This wobble is all the more disappointing because I had been ok, more than ok. The tablets had kicked in, the side effects diminished.
I have realised that the wobble coincided with Isobel going back to nursery and saying goodbye to her on Friday had been quite tough. But I can't use her as a prop, she cannot be my only joy, that is FAR too much responsibility for her little shoulders to bear, so I'm going to get through this.
Perhaps I'll just go put my coat on...