If anyone ever asked me about my favourite Summer the one between my two sixth form years would be well up there on the list: small jobs, cars meaning freedom and lots of time on the beach eating hot doughnuts from the pier.
But this Summer must now top the list. The Summer Spent With My Little Girl, probably the last time I will ever get to spend this much time with her, for this long, EVER.
So, sometimes it's not surprising that I get a little sad. I get sad because I can imagine how much more amazing it could have been, how I could have been so happy I would have popped; maybe it would have been greedy to expect sooo much happiness, but all this angst well that I think I find hard to forgive.
But I will, because that's what I do. I'll be fine because that's also what I do (one day someone will be there and care enough to help me fix it, and not just rely on the fact that I am always 'fine'). I'll fix the great big new financial shadow that is now lurking over my house and home. I'll sort it out, I will. I will make sure that nothing and no-one compromises my little girl.
Yes me, I will do it because, ultimately, I am all there is. But, it's bloody hard.
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