As a management consultant I am paid to advise clients.
Today, prior to offering quite a maverick but obviously genius (and less work for me) system suggestion, I offered these words to my project manager:
You seem stressed; go home and do unspeakable things to your wife, or failing that get you chain saw out, cut something down and set fire to it.
I won't be expecting an update on that action tomorrow.
Always professional me.
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Wednesday, 31 March 2010
Wednesday words
I love Isobel's talking, I'm amazed at her use of the word 'too', she understands perfectly how to use it, her grasp of the possesive is amazing, never has 'mine' and 'yours' been weilded with such passion; her sentences grow daily.
This morning, in my bed, while watching 3rd and Bird, she proclaimed:
'silly 'Obel, button off birdie'
She had indeed accidentally pressed the button and turned off 3rd and Bird, although not before the tune had lodged itself in my head.
Silly obel!
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This morning, in my bed, while watching 3rd and Bird, she proclaimed:
'silly 'Obel, button off birdie'
She had indeed accidentally pressed the button and turned off 3rd and Bird, although not before the tune had lodged itself in my head.
Silly obel!
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Monday, 29 March 2010
Watch out, watch out there's a Humphry about.
I must warn you that this post has been written in my head several times over the last few days, the story has evolved but now I am getting it out of my head it probably won't be that interesting.
I have given birth to a milk monster. Luckily she wasn't such a greedy guzzler when I was breastfeeding, but now she would gladly give up ALL consumption except that of milk, and especially milk served in her bottle.
The result of all this milk guzzling by one who is not a baby cow is runny nappies and dry skin. So I have now switched her to goats milk.
A switch which has coincidently come at the same time as the destruction of our last baby bottle; baby bottles are not designed for teeth, she bit right through the teat!
I made a big play of showing Isobel that is was broken and that we were throwing it away. I held my breath and waited for the drama and misery to unfold.
But, it didn't. She did peer in the bin a few times, but otherwise accepted the previously heartily rejected bottle/cup thingies.
If I'd written this post a few days ago I would be heartily patting myself on the back as her skin is better AND for getting her off the bottle, a battle I was saving until the words 'baby bottle' would upset her.
But I didn't write it then, I left it and now she will drink out of only one replacement bottle.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
I have given birth to a milk monster. Luckily she wasn't such a greedy guzzler when I was breastfeeding, but now she would gladly give up ALL consumption except that of milk, and especially milk served in her bottle.
The result of all this milk guzzling by one who is not a baby cow is runny nappies and dry skin. So I have now switched her to goats milk.
A switch which has coincidently come at the same time as the destruction of our last baby bottle; baby bottles are not designed for teeth, she bit right through the teat!
I made a big play of showing Isobel that is was broken and that we were throwing it away. I held my breath and waited for the drama and misery to unfold.
But, it didn't. She did peer in the bin a few times, but otherwise accepted the previously heartily rejected bottle/cup thingies.
If I'd written this post a few days ago I would be heartily patting myself on the back as her skin is better AND for getting her off the bottle, a battle I was saving until the words 'baby bottle' would upset her.
But I didn't write it then, I left it and now she will drink out of only one replacement bottle.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Wednesday, 24 March 2010
Tuesday, 23 March 2010
Monday, 22 March 2010
I'm afraid of the dark
There are a few things that scare me, but none more than these:
I'm afraid if anything happened to me now my little girl wouldn't remember me.
I'm scared that when the time comes there will be no one who loves me enough to share my pillow or to keep holding my hand until the very end.
Hmm, maybe I should just go back to posting trampoline videos.
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I'm afraid if anything happened to me now my little girl wouldn't remember me.
I'm scared that when the time comes there will be no one who loves me enough to share my pillow or to keep holding my hand until the very end.
Hmm, maybe I should just go back to posting trampoline videos.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Improve your social life - get a trampoline
(considering how I phrased my last bouncy post that could have been: improve your social life - get an errection.)
So, the trampoline is not only drawing us out into the garden, it is also attracting the little people.
First it was the girls coming to put it up.
Last Saturday it was the nursery gang: children varying in braveness and bounciness; parents happy to drink coffee, eat fresh baked croissants and chat, rather than stand in the park.
Yesterday we had our first alfresco meal of the year and it was 'Vieve who came to play.
Although I'm not sure who got the most pleasure bouncing at the end of the garden - 'vieve or her daddy!
Me, I enjoyed watching my little girl exhaust herself while I had a glass of red wine in my hand.
I can feel the summer of 'trampline' love already!
Word from the wise: this will test your pelvic floor.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
So, the trampoline is not only drawing us out into the garden, it is also attracting the little people.
First it was the girls coming to put it up.
Last Saturday it was the nursery gang: children varying in braveness and bounciness; parents happy to drink coffee, eat fresh baked croissants and chat, rather than stand in the park.
Yesterday we had our first alfresco meal of the year and it was 'Vieve who came to play.
Although I'm not sure who got the most pleasure bouncing at the end of the garden - 'vieve or her daddy!
Me, I enjoyed watching my little girl exhaust herself while I had a glass of red wine in my hand.
I can feel the summer of 'trampline' love already!
Word from the wise: this will test your pelvic floor.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Wednesday, 17 March 2010
Monday, 15 March 2010
Mother's Day
This was my third Mother's day; on my first I came home from hospital with beautiful baby girl and my Mummy made sure I had a mother's day card.
Last year PD recreated a fantastic meal we had at Gaucho's.
This year he cooked me a lovely lunch too; he cracked a dish, set fire to a tea towel and himself, but he cooked me lunch and wanted to make it all special as a Mother's day should be.
I am very lucky with many of my relationships:
I wasn't there to make my Mummy's day special - her present hasn't even arrived yet - but I think my brother and sister did that, but that doesn't mean I don't love her, I love her very much.
And although PD and I aren't together, we are bound together by our little girl but we are friends too. Sometimes I guess we are a little too close for exes, but fretting about it and examining what is and what isn't doesn't help. All this confusion doesn't mean I don't love him dearly.
All this confusion doesn't mean we aren't a family; in fact, quite often I think we function better than many more 'traditional' families.
See, lucky lucky me.
Last year PD recreated a fantastic meal we had at Gaucho's.
This year he cooked me a lovely lunch too; he cracked a dish, set fire to a tea towel and himself, but he cooked me lunch and wanted to make it all special as a Mother's day should be.
I am very lucky with many of my relationships:
I wasn't there to make my Mummy's day special - her present hasn't even arrived yet - but I think my brother and sister did that, but that doesn't mean I don't love her, I love her very much.
And although PD and I aren't together, we are bound together by our little girl but we are friends too. Sometimes I guess we are a little too close for exes, but fretting about it and examining what is and what isn't doesn't help. All this confusion doesn't mean I don't love him dearly.
All this confusion doesn't mean we aren't a family; in fact, quite often I think we function better than many more 'traditional' families.
See, lucky lucky me.
Friday, 12 March 2010
Forgotten Friday
There are lots of things I have forgotten.
I have forgotten what it feels like to come home from work and flop on the sofa.
I have forgotten how it felt to be able to blow over £100 on a pair of shoes and not blink.
I have forgotten how to dance into the wee small hours
I have forgotten want the packaging at Agent Provocateur looks like.
I have totally forgotten what not being tired feels like; I regularly anoint by body inside and out with caffine to get by!
I have also forgotten what life was like before Isobel; forgotten that there was ever a time when I wouldn't be picking unidentifiable goo out of hair and wiping something very identifiable from a bottom.
AND I have forgotten what it felt like before my heart grew a billion sizes.
I have forgotten what it feels like to come home from work and flop on the sofa.
I have forgotten how it felt to be able to blow over £100 on a pair of shoes and not blink.
I have forgotten how to dance into the wee small hours
I have forgotten want the packaging at Agent Provocateur looks like.
I have totally forgotten what not being tired feels like; I regularly anoint by body inside and out with caffine to get by!
I have also forgotten what life was like before Isobel; forgotten that there was ever a time when I wouldn't be picking unidentifiable goo out of hair and wiping something very identifiable from a bottom.
AND I have forgotten what it felt like before my heart grew a billion sizes.
Wednesday, 10 March 2010
Birthday Chaos
The party was fun.
HUGE as we shared it, but fun.
I was a little surprised how many parents just stood in the way of the entertainment rather than joining in; but I was also surprised at how many parents absolutely loved the Diddi Dance!
It was worth the nightmares.
HUGE as we shared it, but fun.
I was a little surprised how many parents just stood in the way of the entertainment rather than joining in; but I was also surprised at how many parents absolutely loved the Diddi Dance!
It was worth the nightmares.
Monday, 8 March 2010
No title does this justice
We had a fantastic weekend.
The climax of Isobel's birthday came on Sunday afternoon but more of the later.
Before that, on Saturday, the girls arrived with wine and junk food to help me with an erection.
Now, now don't be so smutty.
What Chantal and Carmen helped erect has provided more longevity that any other kind could!
The climax of Isobel's birthday came on Sunday afternoon but more of the later.
Before that, on Saturday, the girls arrived with wine and junk food to help me with an erection.
Now, now don't be so smutty.
What Chantal and Carmen helped erect has provided more longevity that any other kind could!
Saturday, 6 March 2010
Thursday, 4 March 2010
Grown up?
Yesterday I underwent a minor surgical procedure; it was a follow up job so, against surgeons wishes I opted for a local anaesthetic. The last one was done under general and meant I had to be looked after.
This time I drove myself to hospital, and home again to pick up my little poppet.
Other than Isobel I went home alone.
Now, there is something awfully grown up about driving yourself to or from the airport or hospital, but it also kind of makes you feel a little unloved.
Oh, I'm ok. I have uncomfortable stitches, and people do care. It's just that lump in the throat moment as you walk out the door.
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This time I drove myself to hospital, and home again to pick up my little poppet.
Other than Isobel I went home alone.
Now, there is something awfully grown up about driving yourself to or from the airport or hospital, but it also kind of makes you feel a little unloved.
Oh, I'm ok. I have uncomfortable stitches, and people do care. It's just that lump in the throat moment as you walk out the door.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Tuesday, 2 March 2010
The longest birthday in history
It has to be said that Isobel is having one of the most epic birthdays -epic in DR Zhivago terms.
I mean I love it when cards (and gifts, especially gifts - whom I kidding) arrive late as it makes my birthday last longer, but I'm not really sure when 'obel's birthday started and it isn't over yet.
Did it start last Monday when her new too-cool-for-school trike arrived? I had to give it to her, I'd been coveting since I was pregnant.
Was the beginning when we arrived at Grandma's on Friday and saw Jack-jack and Danel? Or when Grandma and Grandpa gave her a lovely dolls house? We have have been playing 'go wee-wee, washands' and 'teatime, comon dahling sit down' ever since.
Or maybe it was when her cousins arrived.
The 'wow' that greeted the Post Office given to her by my brother Ross and Amanda. In fact she has been well trained, she 'wowed' at the card too. Not sure if the Post Office is realistic, it is only a post office not a Londis too. Also, Isobel thinks the phonebox is actually a phone.
Perhaps, the tea party with family and Miss B and Annabel (quick aside: If Isobel is Miss B's goddaughter and Annabel is mine, does that make them godsisters?)
Maybe it was her actual Birthday on Monday, during which she did start singing 'birthday obel' to herself. Although I must say this was possibly her least exciting day.
Today, Diddi-dance sang happy birthday to her and we decorated party bags for the BIG PARTY that is coming up on Sunday.
I mean I love it when cards (and gifts, especially gifts - whom I kidding) arrive late as it makes my birthday last longer, but I'm not really sure when 'obel's birthday started and it isn't over yet.
Was the beginning when we arrived at Grandma's on Friday and saw Jack-jack and Danel? Or when Grandma and Grandpa gave her a lovely dolls house? We have have been playing 'go wee-wee, washands' and 'teatime, comon dahling sit down' ever since.
Or maybe it was when her cousins arrived.
The 'wow' that greeted the Post Office given to her by my brother Ross and Amanda. In fact she has been well trained, she 'wowed' at the card too. Not sure if the Post Office is realistic, it is only a post office not a Londis too. Also, Isobel thinks the phonebox is actually a phone.
Perhaps, the tea party with family and Miss B and Annabel (quick aside: If Isobel is Miss B's goddaughter and Annabel is mine, does that make them godsisters?)
Maybe it was her actual Birthday on Monday, during which she did start singing 'birthday obel' to herself. Although I must say this was possibly her least exciting day.
Today, Diddi-dance sang happy birthday to her and we decorated party bags for the BIG PARTY that is coming up on Sunday.
Monday, 1 March 2010
Two today
Good morning little girl,
Happy birthday.
It seems very appropriate that today you have changed your song from 'twinkle, star, are up sky, twinkle twinkle' to ....
'birthday toyou, birthday obel, birthday toyou'.
I find myself a little lost for words as to what to say,which is unlike you with your constant stream of chatter and song. Be it 'obel's book gone' 'more milk pease mummy' or requests to get the paint out and do 'tainti' or asking if you will see 'Elish soon' or 'up mummy dance'.
It really is all going on. I can't believe you are two but I am excited about all the conversations we are yet to have.
I love you.
One day I will make you as proud of me as I am of you. Xx
)
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Happy birthday.
It seems very appropriate that today you have changed your song from 'twinkle, star, are up sky, twinkle twinkle' to ....
'birthday toyou, birthday obel, birthday toyou'.
I find myself a little lost for words as to what to say,which is unlike you with your constant stream of chatter and song. Be it 'obel's book gone' 'more milk pease mummy' or requests to get the paint out and do 'tainti' or asking if you will see 'Elish soon' or 'up mummy dance'.
It really is all going on. I can't believe you are two but I am excited about all the conversations we are yet to have.
I love you.
One day I will make you as proud of me as I am of you. Xx
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
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