Of late I have found that shine of blogging has somewhat died.
It isn't because of the hoo-ha over reviewing vs not reviewing etc of blogging war that took place last year; and it isn't because of the growth in numbers of lovely blogs out there now that I often feel I can't keep up with all; it's not because I don't like the competition or the pressure of maintaining a spot on the top 100 (something I am sure I have failed to do this month).
Or maybe it is.
I can't read blogs at work over my lunch like I used to and sad though it may seem my evenings have become somewhat 'crafty' of late. I just seem to be completely unable to keep up with crowd.
It's not that I don't think about posts, that's so not true. I write a million posts in my head but never seem to get round to putting it on paper - well virtual paper, you know what I mean.
For example on Tuesday I thought about writing a post about how we had come back from the Isle of Wight where we surrounded by lovely family and friends, and felt a little flat and a lotta lonely. Isobel had loved seeing Grandma and Grandpa and terrorising Jack the dog, but most of all she had loved seeing her cousins and they had loved seeing her. They played brilliantly, I have never heard so much joyous screaming in my life, it's just as well Mummy's house is detached or I am sure the police would have been called.
So on Tuesday it would have been a sad, lonely, woe-is-me single mum pity post.
But the Wednesday came and the post had kind of morphed into a 'cant-always-get-what-you-want-but-try-sometime-and-you-get-what-you-need' post. I'd commuted to work with lovely train pals and one of my newest bestest friends and had a good old chin-wag. The beautiful bells of St Pauls heralded my arrival at the office; the man in the coffee shop wrote me a lovely note on my fruit toast bag; and I was greeted in the office with 'hello pretty lady'.
What more could a girl need?
I have a lovely life.
I even had a man around who gave a great quote for relieving some of my claustrophobia - by knocking down a wall sillies - what did you think I meant?
I had texts and invitations - oh my I have a LIFE, well at least the potential of one if I could just find a babysitter, so all was good.
When I rewrote the post in my head on Friday, a third of the staff had been fired in the office, I'm a contractor I could be next...
You get the idea.
If I don't write the post it goes around and around in my head, it grows it shrinks and meanwhile my life moves on.
And I just don't manage to blog it.
What is the point of this? I have no idea, but hey it's a post.
(Oh and yes, despite my blogging angst I will be at Cyber Mummy)