Left-hand drive is child's play

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Nobody told me but I'm telling you...

Nobody told me that being a mum would give me calluses on the TOPS of my feet and on my knees.

Nobody told me that floor boards leave an imprint on your cheek if you fish under the settee for long enough.

Nobody told me that my voice would go up enough octaves to be heard by dogs.

Nobody told me that I would suddenly find camping cool

or that I would contemplate wearing shorts.

And most certainly no one told me that I would do this on my own.

(Nor that sometimes I would incredibly grateful that I am a single mum)

Hello, I'm back

I have been neglecting my blog; I've been writing posts in my head but never committing them.

So what have I been doing with my time? Well, the crochet induced RSI is a clue, the Glampervan on the side bar of the blog is another. In fact they are both connected. Yes, I have been crocheting a seventies style Afghan for Clementine the campervan.

Unfortunately setting up Glampervan has involved slightly more than simply getting out my crochet hook, internet shopping for plates and tents, and making cushions. There's the website, the insurance, the drooling over camping books such as The Camper Van Cookbook and Cool Camping Kids book. Oh and there are merchant accounts, blah blah blah.

And now the bank has messed up my money transfer so I still haven't collected Clementine.

But I have run out of wool so here I am saying hello!

He's older but no wiser

Happy birthday PD




Amazing though it may seem, we don't look at other Daddies and wish we had them instead of you. Xx

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Story Time

Sunday evening, following her bath Isobel had PD and I lie down on my bed.  At first she lay in the middle and then she moved to other end.

'All tobeber close eyes'

Which we did.

And the she proceeded to tell us a story:

'Once buponatime...'

it was a short story, because then it was:

'Wakey, Wakey!'

A sign of beauty

Isobel has her first freckle.

My Great Auntie Rita always used to tell me freckles were a sign of beauty and it must be true because I'm covered in them!

(Mind you her father has plenty too)

I was quite excited to spot it, but not in the dying-woman-on-Beaches-who-names-each-of-her-daughters-freckles kind of a way.

But is this a sign that I haven't put enough suncream on her?

Baring all

No this isn't me baring my soul; it isn't an 'oh I'm depressed, anxious and unloved'; I don't have the back of my hand pressed to my forehead in a dramatic 'woe is me' kind of a way.

Nope, this about taking off all ones clothes and running around naked! Bare bummed, in the nod, whatever you choose to call it. But, I promise that my getting naked in public is so last year, literally last year.

Isobel has taken to running around sans clothes. Yesterday, she spent much of the day running in and out of the garden; jumping on the trampoline and generally being bare bummed.

And I must say, I really don't have an issue with this. Don't all children do it? Isn't it natural for a child to run round unfettered in this way?

PD does seem to have an issue, even down to questioning that a perve maybe standing staring in the front window of our quiet residential street. (I have new frosting on there now, so this can't be the issue now.)

Other parents seem to have an issue as they struggle at a BBQ in my back garden to stop their children doing the same.

Isobel wore a bikini to a recent BBQ where I knew there was going to be a paddling pool. This wasn't out of any prudishness on my part but was simply her choice of outfit. I'm now glad she did because it means I can post the video of the fun she had without fear of miss use.

But, again isn't it sad that I even have to think that way?

I'm sure I ran around naked at the age of two? What's wrong with it?

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Adjectives and other words

No Isobel does not know her nouns from her pro-nouns yet, It's just that I have been amazed at hr a child's language develops.

First it was little girl's correct use of 'too' that surprised me; 'mummy too' when going to the park with daddy etc

But recently things have become 'really stuck' or Isobel is suddenly 'really busy mummy' just when it is bathtime.

Isobel and Elif were having a long conversation about buses the other morning:

I: 'Bus!'
E: 'Bus!'
I: 'Big bus'
E: 'Red bus'
I: 'Bus really heavy'

You can't argue with that, can you.

Cyber stuff

Well if starting a new business hadn't already distracted me from the path of righteousness that is (mummy) blogging, missing Cyber Mummy may well and truly put me on th back foot.

The mummyrati will be there and I won't. I won't be there for many reasons such as no childcare; but I will be more than compensated than the arrival of my bestest friend Miss B.

I'll be compensated but will my blog?! I guess I best pay it some attention over the coming weeks

PS. If anyone would like my cyber mummy ticket please let me know - all reasonable offers

You can always tweet me @surprisedzoe

Busy Bee

No prizes for guessing that that is a VW camper in the previous post.

But, Clementine (yes we have named her, well by we I mean me!) is very nearly ours. Anyone who has ever read any of my posts will know I am the sort of girl who has MANY romantic notions and even more aspirations; Clementine is actually a combination of the two.

I have images of my little girl and I touring France in our camper, it's taken me a while to get to grips with what I'll do in the evenings once she is bed, but I've sussed it - I just need an epic novel to read by my campfire. As a practice run, I've booked us into Britchcombe Farm.

But I am not a born hippy, I do not intend to spend our lives living in the back of the camper. No, and neither have a won the lottery, so I've turned this romantic notion into a business: Glampervan!

Wish us luck: I'm not sure which we need more for the business or the camping.

(More changes are afoot, I'll tell you more when I can breathe)

Wordless Wednesday because all will become clear

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Hot off the press!

Man grows tail!

Yes, you heard it here first: PD has a tail!

The way he tells it is that when Isobel walked in on him in the shower she said:

Daddy! Daddy has a big tail.

Yes, he is adament she said 'big tail'.



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Fickle

So, as a single mum I often find myself bemoaning my lack of freedom.

But, here I am just returning from a barbeque out Brixton way and I find myself sitting on the bed in little girl's room missing her.

I know PD needs to have her more often and I know I'd like to go out more, so it should be a win win but, it isn't.

Little girl wasn't happy to find me gone, and while it was great to be with peeps who seem to like me for me, I've come home and I am deafened by the lack of my daughter breathing. I miss her; her cot seems very empty.

But I suspect when she demands to come home in the early hours of the morning, I will wish for 'just ten more minutes'.

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Forget the other animals part two

You really can't call my family set-up conventional.

I have two half brothers - making far more than a whole one I must say; I have a very lovely half-sister who is more than enough of a sister for me and a step sister.

I have a step-mother and a step-father.

I have a Daddy and a distant father daughter relationship that we are working on.

And I have a Mummy, and I have had one of those tricky mother daughter relationships that has got less tricky as life goes on, and lets face it where my life goes my mummy kind of goes too.

What am I trying to say here?

Simply that while it may not be your nuclear family, it has a whole lot of love.

No you can't have one!

(yes it is two different babies)




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Hanging out and over

No, I'm not talking about my waistband.

I had a great afternoon with Isobel's nursery crowd and associated parents, I think we could have all sat there until sun down but at 7 we all had to turn into the sandman for the sake of our two year olds. I think I must have drunk more than I thought I had...

I mean it could be that at 4am I was picking charming lumps of vomit from my daughter's hair, so maybe I was just tired...

but today I craved....

....

diet coke.

Is there something you only want when you have over indulged?

Halfway down the stair

It has to be said I'm all over the show at the moment.

In the course of today I have been grateful for the life I live; smiled at myself as I strolled along a sunny southbank to work; been pleased with the colour of my hair yet dissappointed that it's getting 'sparklier'. Happy with all the little things that make me smile.

I have been pleased with myself for my business venture that seems to be gathering pace; excited about new work opportunities that may come my way.

I'm excited about the nursery crew barbie I'm hosting tomorrow.

I've even congratulated myself on this great life and on my beautiful daughter.

But, and it's a big BUT, I have been gripped with fear and anxiety too. Not all of it rational.

I've even moaned about being stuck at home, nearly alone on a Friday night.

Right at this point in time I feel a little tearful.

I guess that's what they call a balanced life.


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Forget the other animals this post is about my family

You know how cool it is to be surrounded by wonderful people who make you feel cool too?

I do.

I feel that way at all my family gatherings when I am surrounded by my cousins. Be it a happy or a sad occasion I love their company.

Last year my cousin Verity married the charming Owen and that very happy social occasion breathed life back into me.

Grandad passed away, and we drank far too much, slept in bunk beds and generally came together as a family.

Most recently my brother Ross and his lovely Mando married;they even took the brave step if having a two year old as a flower girl (luckily their other two flower girls were perfectly behaved) and the family danced again, as it seems only our family can. (My school friend was the Registrar - how grown up does that make me?)

Is it just that cousins is one of those relationships that demands nothing but means so much?

I can only hope that everyone feels this secure in their extended family as I do.

Spot the mum who knows her sofa covers fit in the washing machine

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Our favourite kind of weekend

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Is it really hip to be square?

I have heard some wonderful toddler road rage stories, stories containing words that I am not sure I should type. The best story I have ever heard came from my boss, but I won't put it down here. If you meet me ask me, it really is the best story ever.

I do remember thinking to myself when I was pregnant that perhaps my use of the F word, which while not exactly profligate, was regular, would have to be curtailed.

But instead of being proud of the fact that my daughter doesn't swear I must admit to being disappointed that I have no tale to tell.

When we are stuck in traffic my little girl says 'scuse me car'. She say 'oops' when she drops things; giggles when she farts and says excuse me when she burps. She watches the 'television' not the telly.

She is a nice girl.

And her mother is obviously a square non-potty mouth.

The Gallery - men

This weeks photographic challenge in Sticky Fingers Gallery is Men.

For good or bad the main man in mine and little girl's lives is PD.

We are not together in the traditional sence of the word. Let's face it sometimes we are SO not together.

But, mostly we all love each other dearly.

I can't imagine what it will be like when we have to share him, but let's face it, it won't be as hard as when he has to share US.






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Skip to the loo my darling

This is my entry for the song title carnival. Given that the highlight of my day has been that my daughter has had a completely dry knicker day.

So, while I'm not qualified to give advice I can tell you what we did.

We waited. We waited until isobel was ready. Yes, she has been sitting on the loo for ages, but she has used it more as a library than a recepticle.

Last week things changed: Every night following her bedtime milk, we brushed teeth, sat on the loo and hey presto it happened! EVERY night.

This is why I decided to get on with it Two (very loooong) days at home to get it going. First wee on potty and she decided potty wasn't for her.

Nursery kind of helped and didn't; by Thursday they popped her in a nappy, while telling me pull ups were just the same.

We've used 'big girls knickers' and by that I don't mean Bridget Jones pants. Pull ups just for rare risky situations, but she still asks to go to the loo when wearing pull ups.

And in the last couple of days we have added a star chart to the mix. It's by the toilet so she can apply the stars in-situ.

So we are on day seven and I'm hoping the worst is done; I say worst but it really hasn't been too bad.

No, I haven't kept my daughter locked in the loo. We have been to the park, the cafe and the supermarket; poor little girl has been dragged to the loo in each of these places, well not the park.

(Confession: I hate public loos, it's only in the last few years that I have dared venture in them. Something tells me I will be visiting them a more frequently from now on. OMG imagine taking little girl into a portaloo at festival time, especially as she doesn't like it if someone has left 'messages' in the loo. Where did I put the nappies?)





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Sponsored post - Beauty I try to be, 21 I am most definitely not

I am a mascara hussy, I really am.  It is the only piece of make-up I could not possibly live without; I would resort to coal dust if I had to.

So, I was quite excited when, my package arrived from Beauty21 containing 'sexy curves' mascara.  I have many, many curves of my own and to balance these curves with lashes is always my mission.  Loved the mascara but you see I am a weeper so I have to waterproof all the way, but that was ok I just layered on another favourite on top.

Not so sure about the orangy lipgloss though - but Isobel loves it.

Anywhere you can mix all you favourite brands is good for me - I mean who hasn't spent hours in Boots!  So in my package I had Rimmel and Elizabeth Arden Bronzer plus brush - looks good in compact but I haven't braved it yet, but I am sure I will!

Seven days, seven things

I was tagged for a Meme by Muddling Along Mummy but it is one I have done before plus I really don't think there are seven things you don't know about me!

So I thought I'd tell you 7 things I have done in the last seven days simply because I actually HAVE seven things to tell you.

1. This time last week I had been drinking champagne for two hours and was to find myself stumbling out of a bar at 2am, feeling very proud of myself for partying, flirting and laughing.

2. I had my first MacDonalds in recent history - I'd forgotten how good a cheese burger can be!

3. On Wednesday I taught Kriss Akabusi a short meditation.

4. I have lost 4lbs on the Dukan Diet - I can now get into my dress for a wedding in a few weeks (no not mine)

5. I have started a counselling course and have a feeling my tutor (it's online) is actually the brother of an ex boyfriend and I don't think he ever liked me, especially after I broke his brother's heart. But that was a long-time ago I'm sure he won't grade me accordingly will he?

6. I have potty trained my daughter - well made a blooming good start.

7. Started looking for my vocation

It has been a fantastic seven days, thanks to many many people in my life.  This award (maybe without the blogger bit) is for you.

A lonely only

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Doomed

Yes, it’s a hung parliament and the country is going to hell in a boat but we have no idea what colours the sails are yet.  Yes, I am glued to the bbc as I type this (luckily I have two monitors at work; no this doesn’t make me important) but I flipped to the Guardian and my heart has sunk.

 

In Life and Style I have been educated about the phrase ‘lonely only’; I have heard how depressing it can be to look out the window and see your child playing on their own.

 

So, I am now adding to my basic mother guilt, not only the guilt of being a single parent family, but the guilt that my daughter will, undoubtedly, be an only child.

 

What does this conjure up to you?

 

Lonely;

Spoilt…

 

Loved!!!

 

 

 

Solitary

So Friday I arrived at nursery to find my daughter howling and screaming lying on the floor having inflicted a non-fatal-but-red-mark-making blow to her best friend. All over a singing Christmas Tree.

Great.

But, Saturday morning we met up with the same best friend for coffee and you have never seen two little girls play so well: Isobel shared her Albert and her sunglasses, while I guiltily confessed that it was indeed my child who had caused the red mark that was by now barely visible.

Sunday while I drank away a hangover we had more friends for lunch and, for the most part, Isobel shared beautifully with little 'vieve. Ok, there was a tussle over a Ben and Holly mobile phone, but generally all was good and it was great to hangout.







Elif popped in and again you could see the love between Isobel and her BFF. They have their own private jokes, silly jigs and songs - they really are real little people. It's hard to imagine them fighting.







After such a social weekend - including real-life partying to the wee hours on my part (I am a real person - yay for me) - today's solitary confinement has been fun but bloomin long.

So with all this good behaviour why are we in solitary confinement?

We are Potty training

It had to be you

It is with a heavy and anxious heart that I write this post.

It may be hard for you to believe but that beautiful little girl of mine, the little girl who, quite literally, is my someone to bless me whenever I sneeze; the little girl who will sing herself to sleep and to school; the little girl who says 'lovu' down the telephone and always says 'alllright mummy' whenever I drop something (which is often) is ....

in danger of becoming a brat.

There I said it.

At nursery she has taken to smacking children who come near. Well that may be an exasperation, but her jealousy seems to know no bounds.

Now I know that jealousy stems from insecurity, but what I don't know is what to do about it?

Please don't get me wrong, she can be kind and there are days at nursery where she spends the day wiping noses and kissing upset children better.

But, these days are outnumbered by those where she is demanding, hardwork and out of control.

I love my daughter, PD loves his daughter, most people love her. But how long will that last?

Lady of letters

For the last few months Isobel has been learning her letters.

I was going to say that this has happened by accident, but I realise that when you buy your baby foam letters for her bath AND a wooden alphabet
puzzle, not to mention magnetic letters, that the must be some intent, even if just subconciously.

Anyway, you'd think I'd be proud of myself for teaching my daughter that 'G' is for giraffe, grandma and grandpa.

But no: even when isobel is happily pointing out 'M' for mummy, I chastise myself because I taught her the capitals not with lowercase.

Bloomin mother guilt strikes again!




-- Post From My iPhone

Packing my satchel

Yes, you read correctly: I am packing my satchel. I am very proud of my bright yellow satchel and now I am going to school!

Yay for me!

It's only a two day train the trainer course, but hopefully it's a new begining. With doubt over my current contract it was a fabulous excuse for reinvention.

Let's face it is a break from norm and requires a step out of my bubble, but the only thing I seem to be anxious about is arriving on time and a taxi will fix that.

I am genuinely excited; I have planned my outfit and everything.

But, slightly gutted I didn't use this to buy stationery. Thankfully PD and Little girl but me new notebook at Christmas and now I can use it. That and my muji highlighted pencils mean I am sorted.

I am that easily pleased. I just hope I don't make a mess of the first page.







-- Post From My iPhone

This was meant to be a picture of little girl rocking the whole socks and sandals look, but we nearly missed the shoes.




-- Post From My iPhone

One of the reasons I haven't blogged much

I've been busy exercising my inner old lady.




-- Post From My iPhone

The nearly naked chef

-- Post From My iPhone

The great White

So spring is busy springing and summer is yet to come, but the end of the day a girl likes to take off her opaques.

So my legs have never been my best feature, and they are extremely pale not hairy but just a great white expanse, I certainly wasn't prepared for little girl's reaction:

'tights mummy. Pleeeeease mummy tights please'.


-- Post From My iPhone

Friday fings

These are things I have found myself uttering lately:

'You know you have been too long on the loo when your daughter comes and lays out a picnic.'

'yes, I know I have been having chest pains but do I honestly look like I'm having a heart attack. Ok, don't answer that.'

'I think what bothers me most, is that it bothers me'







-- Post From My iPhone

Outdoor games

In our house we don't seem to discriminate between indoor and outdoor games.

While I was busy trying to channel Charlie Dimmock, (yes I did try bra-less but it made moving between gardening and the trampoline somewhat eye-threatening,) Isobel was busy making money.











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Life and times of a blog post

Of late I have found that shine of blogging has somewhat died.

It isn't because of the hoo-ha over reviewing vs not reviewing etc of blogging war that took place last year; and it isn't because of the growth in numbers of lovely blogs out there now that I often feel I can't keep up with all; it's not because I don't like the competition or the pressure of maintaining a spot on the top 100 (something I am sure I have failed to do this month).

Or maybe it is.

I can't read blogs at work over my lunch like I used to and sad though it may seem my evenings have become somewhat 'crafty' of late. I just seem to be completely unable to keep up with crowd.

It's not that I don't think about posts, that's so not true. I write a million posts in my head but never seem to get round to putting it on paper - well virtual paper, you know what I mean.

For example on Tuesday I thought about writing a post about how we had come back from the Isle of Wight where we surrounded by lovely family and friends, and felt a little flat and a lotta lonely. Isobel had loved seeing Grandma and Grandpa and terrorising Jack the dog, but most of all she had loved seeing her cousins and they had loved seeing her. They played brilliantly, I have never heard so much joyous screaming in my life, it's just as well Mummy's house is detached or I am sure the police would have been called.

So on Tuesday it would have been a sad, lonely, woe-is-me single mum pity post.

But the Wednesday came and the post had kind of morphed into a 'cant-always-get-what-you-want-but-try-sometime-and-you-get-what-you-need' post. I'd commuted to work with lovely train pals and one of my newest bestest friends and had a good old chin-wag. The beautiful bells of St Pauls heralded my arrival at the office; the man in the coffee shop wrote me a lovely note on my fruit toast bag; and I was greeted in the office with 'hello pretty lady'.

What more could a girl need?

I have a lovely life.

I even had a man around who gave a great quote for relieving some of my claustrophobia - by knocking down a wall sillies - what did you think I meant?

I had texts and invitations - oh my I have a LIFE, well at least the potential of one if I could just find a babysitter, so all was good.

When I rewrote the post in my head on Friday, a third of the staff had been fired in the office, I'm a contractor I could be next...

You get the idea.

If I don't write the post it goes around and around in my head, it grows it shrinks and meanwhile my life moves on.

And I just don't manage to blog it.

What is the point of this? I have no idea, but hey it's a post.

(Oh and yes, despite my blogging angst I will be at Cyber Mummy)

This morning...

Two little girlies walked hand in hand to nursery.

One had skipped to catch up with the other.

As their bunches swung, the discussed how cold it was:

'obel hand cold' was greeted with 'hmm cold'

Two two year old little old ladies.




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Thankful-for-all-the-birthday-gifts Thursday

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Definately in the jeans

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It's in the jeans

I have just made a disturbing discovery: my daughter has more pairs of jeans than I do!

Maybe her need is greater but there is surely a principle here.

I mean, maybe I do manage to go more than half a day before I get a wet bum from a damp slide; roll in the mud; or get yellow paint on my knees while doing hand prints; and I do manage to wash my hands slightly less thoroughly, meaning I don't get wet to my toes doing so.

But, surely as the head of this households my jeans should dominate?







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More Wednesday words

As a management consultant I am paid to advise clients.

Today, prior to offering quite a maverick but obviously genius (and less work for me) system suggestion, I offered these words to my project manager:

You seem stressed; go home and do unspeakable things to your wife, or failing that get you chain saw out, cut something down and set fire to it.

I won't be expecting an update on that action tomorrow.

Always professional me.


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Wednesday words

I love Isobel's talking, I'm amazed at her use of the word 'too', she understands perfectly how to use it, her grasp of the possesive is amazing, never has 'mine' and 'yours' been weilded with such passion; her sentences grow daily.

This morning, in my bed, while watching 3rd and Bird, she proclaimed:

'silly 'Obel, button off birdie'

She had indeed accidentally pressed the button and turned off 3rd and Bird, although not before the tune had lodged itself in my head.

Silly obel!




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Watch out, watch out there's a Humphry about.

I must warn you that this post has been written in my head several times over the last few days, the story has evolved but now I am getting it out of my head it probably won't be that interesting.

I have given birth to a milk monster. Luckily she wasn't such a greedy guzzler when I was breastfeeding, but now she would gladly give up ALL consumption except that of milk, and especially milk served in her bottle.

The result of all this milk guzzling by one who is not a baby cow is runny nappies and dry skin. So I have now switched her to goats milk.

A switch which has coincidently come at the same time as the destruction of our last baby bottle; baby bottles are not designed for teeth, she bit right through the teat!

I made a big play of showing Isobel that is was broken and that we were throwing it away. I held my breath and waited for the drama and misery to unfold.

But, it didn't. She did peer in the bin a few times, but otherwise accepted the previously heartily rejected bottle/cup thingies.

If I'd written this post a few days ago I would be heartily patting myself on the back as her skin is better AND for getting her off the bottle, a battle I was saving until the words 'baby bottle' would upset her.

But I didn't write it then, I left it and now she will drink out of only one replacement bottle.




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Wordless wednesday

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Do you think we should have bought a garage?

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I'm afraid of the dark

There are a few things that scare me, but none more than these:

I'm afraid if anything happened to me now my little girl wouldn't remember me.

I'm scared that when the time comes there will be no one who loves me enough to share my pillow or to keep holding my hand until the very end.

Hmm, maybe I should just go back to posting trampoline videos.


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Improve your social life - get a trampoline

(considering how I phrased my last bouncy post that could have been: improve your social life - get an errection.)

So, the trampoline is not only drawing us out into the garden, it is also attracting the little people.

First it was the girls coming to put it up.

Last Saturday it was the nursery gang: children varying in braveness and bounciness; parents happy to drink coffee, eat fresh baked croissants and chat, rather than stand in the park.



Yesterday we had our first alfresco meal of the year and it was 'Vieve who came to play.
Although I'm not sure who got the most pleasure bouncing at the end of the garden - 'vieve or her daddy!



Me, I enjoyed watching my little girl exhaust herself while I had a glass of red wine in my hand.

I can feel the summer of 'trampline' love already!

Word from the wise: this will test your pelvic floor.


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Wordless Wednesday

Picture courtesy of Elif's daddy!

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Mother's Day

This was my third Mother's day; on my first I came home from hospital with beautiful baby girl and my Mummy made sure I had a mother's day card.

Last year PD recreated a fantastic meal we had at Gaucho's.

This year he cooked me a lovely lunch too; he cracked a dish, set fire to a tea towel and himself, but he cooked me lunch and wanted to make it all special as a Mother's day should be.

I am very lucky with many of my relationships:

I wasn't there to make my Mummy's day special - her present hasn't even arrived yet - but I think my brother and sister did that, but that doesn't mean I don't love her, I love her very much.

And although PD and I aren't together, we are bound together by our little girl but we are friends too. Sometimes I guess we are a little too close for exes, but fretting about it and examining what is and what isn't doesn't help. All this confusion doesn't mean I don't love him dearly.

All this confusion doesn't mean we aren't a family; in fact, quite often I think we function better than many more 'traditional' families.

See, lucky lucky me.

Forgotten Friday

There are lots of things I have forgotten.

I have forgotten what it feels like to come home from work and flop on the sofa.

I have forgotten how it felt to be able to blow over £100 on a pair of shoes and not blink.

I have forgotten how to dance into the wee small hours

I have forgotten want the packaging at Agent Provocateur looks like.

I have totally forgotten what not being tired feels like; I regularly anoint by body inside and out with caffine to get by!

I have also forgotten what life was like before Isobel; forgotten that there was ever a time when I wouldn't be picking unidentifiable goo out of hair and wiping something very identifiable from a bottom.

AND I have forgotten what it felt like before my heart grew a billion sizes.

Birthday Chaos

The party was fun.

HUGE as we shared it, but fun.

I was a little surprised how many parents just stood in the way of the entertainment rather than joining in; but I was also surprised at how many parents absolutely loved the Diddi Dance!



It was worth the nightmares.

No title does this justice

We had a fantastic weekend.

The climax of Isobel's birthday came on Sunday afternoon but more of the later.

Before that, on Saturday, the girls arrived with wine and junk food to help me with an erection.

Now, now don't be so smutty.

What Chantal and Carmen helped erect has provided more longevity that any other kind could!

Couldn't resist

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(In)action girl

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Grown up?

Yesterday I underwent a minor surgical procedure; it was a follow up job so, against surgeons wishes I opted for a local anaesthetic. The last one was done under general and meant I had to be looked after.

This time I drove myself to hospital, and home again to pick up my little poppet.

Other than Isobel I went home alone.

Now, there is something awfully grown up about driving yourself to or from the airport or hospital, but it also kind of makes you feel a little unloved.

Oh, I'm ok. I have uncomfortable stitches, and people do care. It's just that lump in the throat moment as you walk out the door.


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The longest birthday in history

It has to be said that Isobel is having one of the most epic birthdays -epic in DR Zhivago terms.

I mean I love it when cards (and gifts, especially gifts - whom I kidding) arrive late as it makes my birthday last longer, but I'm not really sure when 'obel's birthday started and it isn't over yet.

Did it start last Monday when her new too-cool-for-school trike arrived?  I had to give it to her, I'd been coveting since I was pregnant.

Was the beginning when we arrived at Grandma's on Friday and saw Jack-jack and Danel?  Or when Grandma and Grandpa gave her a lovely dolls house?  We have have been playing 'go wee-wee, washands' and 'teatime, comon dahling sit down' ever since.




Or maybe it was when her cousins arrived.

The 'wow' that greeted the Post Office given to her by my brother Ross and Amanda.  In fact she has been well trained, she 'wowed' at the card too. Not sure if the Post Office is realistic, it is only a post office not a Londis too.  Also, Isobel thinks the phonebox is actually a phone.

Perhaps, the tea party with family and Miss B and Annabel (quick aside: If Isobel is Miss B's goddaughter and Annabel is mine, does that make them godsisters?)





Maybe it was her actual Birthday on Monday, during which she did start singing 'birthday obel' to herself. Although I must say this was possibly her least exciting day.

Today, Diddi-dance sang happy birthday to her and we decorated party bags for the BIG PARTY that is coming up on Sunday.

Two today

Good morning little girl,

Happy birthday.

It seems very appropriate that today you have changed your song from 'twinkle, star, are up sky, twinkle twinkle' to ....

'birthday toyou, birthday obel, birthday toyou'.

I find myself a little lost for words as to what to say,which is unlike you with your constant stream of chatter and song. Be it 'obel's book gone' 'more milk pease mummy' or requests to get the paint out and do 'tainti' or asking if you will see 'Elish soon' or 'up mummy dance'.

It really is all going on. I can't believe you are two but I am excited about all the conversations we are yet to have.

I love you.

One day I will make you as proud of me as I am of you. Xx







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