Mummy Christmas Fail

It so nearly could have been a failure on a catastrophic level.

The magic of Christmas - 'poof' gone in a puff of pantomime smoke.

I say nearly.

There have been a few small fails, like the handmade stocking from last year being visible around the house all year until December when in vanished without a trace. Perhaps it was snaffled by an elf.









But the big one, the one that would have been an absolute disaster; the one that would have meant broken hearts and shattered dreams quicker than you could drop a bauble?

Well that starts with a post I didn't write.

Isobel watches a lot more telly than would probably be approved off, for me as she plays and sings and dances and is happy I really do not care. Another Mummy fail is that all her favourite programmes are on commercial channels sprinkled rather liberally with adverts; adverts Isobel also ways viewed as an annoying interruption to her schedule.

Until the end of November.

In November Isobel graduated to being impressionable and from somewhere she finally got the idea that all these things were available. Just in time for Christmas no less.

Ignoring this sudden exploration of ALL that is available, I blithly went ahead and bought little girl's Christmas presents.

Now, thanks to the wonders of Peppa Pig one of these I have got spot on.

The other, yes she has only asked for two things, is nothing like the gift I bought.

Isobel has not deviated from her desire. Santa popped into nursery yesterday, leaving his Reindeer on the roof of course, but he only gave Isobel a book.

Little girl return home excited by the visit, but along with Reindeer on the roof her top comment was the lack of the gift she really wanted.

A BIG MUMMY FAIL - my daughter's first proper gift request was not to be granted.

So, I did what all good mother's would. Went to the toy shop at 9am and using the very lasy of my pennies (really, i'm not joking here,) bought the appropriate gift (well my version of her choice - i.e. wooden not plastic).

and I bought a Santa sack for £1 in Poundland to replace the AWOL one.

More jingly stuff

Last moth I really enjoyed reading about everyone's Christmases in their John Lewis posts. In fact I was so excited I'm sure I wrote essays in everyone's comments.

Now I wasn't lucky enough to be sponsored to write this post, but hey I thought I'd like to write my post anyway.

Not so much rules but more how I like my Christmas to be.

It's pretty much always been the same but some of the major players have turned into bit parts in my life, but heigh ho - Christmas is still Christmas.

I've always been very lucky in love and have never had to divide my Christmas between mine and someone elses family. My first love lived around the corner so we could still be together on the day, and the only Christmas I wasn't at home , he wasn't either because we were in OZ. My longest relationship was with a guy who was half danish, his maternal half. This very conveniently meant his family celebrated on Christmas Eve.

PD, well PD and I are making a new family tradition just for our little family. We spend Christmas eve together. This year Isobel and I will go to his place for lunch so Isobel can open her pressies in situ and they will become the toys at Daddy's house. He's already planning his menu after which we will return to mine for cheese and port and little girl will open her presents from me.

Otherwise you may still find me own the pub with my school friends Christmas eve - yes nigh on 20 years on that kind of gathering still takes place.

So, that's Christmas Eve.

Christmas Day, it's up bright and early and in the car to catch the one Christmas morning ferry to the Isle of Wight. I actually love this ferry trip. No one is grumpy, everyone is sparkly and it get's me out of Christmas lunch preparation.

In fact we will arrive at Mummy's just in time to open the fizz.

This year we have decided to limit the amount of time we expect little ones to sit at the table by swapping a seated started for canapes that can be eaten as the children open the one present they are allowed from under the tree, the one that is meant to keep them amused until after lunch.

This does mean I am redundant as chief starter-prettier-upperer, but I'm sure I'll cope. It will also allow a space between this and lunch, more room for turkey and sprouts.

My mum will make a fantastic Christmas lunch with more stuffings than you could possibly imagine, including apple and celery for me.

And then, and only then it is presents! Presents dished out by Hayley probably, presents we all open one at a time, thus filling pretty much the rest of the day.

Boxing day lunch is bubble and squeak and a cheese board that lasts ALL day.

Oh and the bestest and newest thing Mummy and I have come up with this year - the children can wear fancy dress!

Jingle bells

Actually this post has nothing to do with jingling but as it's everything to do with Christmas I used it anyway... Laughing all the way...

Isobel and I have crammed all our Christmas entertaining into one weekend so I thought I'd let you know our tips.

For half a dozen under twos (yes I am a little loopy and no I didn't get snaps, nearly took some of aftermath) you need 50 cocktail sausages. Oh actually it was 49, I found an ember of an escapee two days later. Feed the mums, and dad, fizz and pomegranate juice, scatter party with a liberal sprinking of chocolate coins and all will be absolutely lovely.




Sunday was lunch for 8 at mine. Isobel being the only tea-totaler.
Our secret this time, those homemade truffles and racing brussel sprouts.

Other than that today we did Christmas wrapping. Combine my tasteful brown paper with my pet elf's finger painting skills and we finally have things to put under the tree!


Here are our paperchains, no idea why I took it at the jaunty angle (I was sober).




Truffles: 225g plain chocolate, 175 ml double cream. Heat the cream to a rolling boil and pour over the chocolate (already broken up of course). Allow to set a little in the bowl then scoop out with a teaspoon, with icing flour dusted hands roll into balls and then into cocoa or nuts. If you fancy a tipsy truffle add about 50ml of booze, but these truffles will be messier to roll. If you like the ginger idea you can wizz in stem ginger, or cheap and use a ginger chocolate bar as part of the recipe.

Enjoy.


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Chains that bind us

Our second day of Christmas saw me licking over 200 strips of silver paper to make paperchains.

Next year I may get inventive with the pinking shears.

And next year little girl better be more interested and get her own tongue out, rather than just eating the strips, dragging the chains around and refusing to let Mummy up the steps.

Today is the third day and I will be drinking in the festive spirit.